KDI Korea’s Economy | The Defining Moment of My Life
An essay written personally by artist Kim Hyun Jung for the "The Defining Moment of My Life" column in Korea's Economy, published by the KDI Economic Information Center. She looks back on the second half of 2012, when she was torn between becoming a full-time artist and taking a regular job, a period she devoted to the "Naesoong" series that culminated in her debut exhibition, "Naesoong Story," at Ain Gallery and Woorim Gallery in March 2013. She closes with the thought that the most defining moment in life may be every single day.
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From "Art Student" to "Naesoong Artist"
The Defining Moment of My Life
Kim Hyun Jung, Korean Painter
Representative works: "Naesoong: Narcissus," "Pomsaengpomsa: I'm the Best," and others
Around the time I was finishing my final semester of college, in June 2012, I was hardly sleeping most nights. Having painted since childhood, I had to decide whether to walk the path of a full-time artist, become an office worker, or find some other path entirely. At the time, I was painting on the theme of "Naesoong," and I endlessly agonized over whether my work could receive a positive reception in the art world, and whether I could even use the word "Naesoong" as a title for my work. With no confidence in what I was doing, my lack of self-assurance kept feeding my sense of confusion and anxiety.
Then, that fall, I received an invitation for a solo exhibition at Ain Gallery in Busan. I was also selected for the "Invitational Exhibition for Promising New Artists" and got the chance to exhibit at a gallery in Insadong, Seoul. Both exhibitions were scheduled for the following March, six months out. But I still hadn't decided whether to keep painting "Naesoong Story" or to draw something new. My doubt kept growing, yet ironically, there was nothing besides Naesoong Story that I wanted to paint at all. I kept being drawn in by some unnamable magnetism. Every time I painted Naesoong Story, the self I faced felt comfortable, and putting that self on canvas was also a process of healing, of comforting myself. When I painted, the comfort that came from immersion pushed back the vague anxiety and depression. From that fall until the following March, for six months, I devoted myself solely to the Naesoong Story work. In March 2013, about twenty of those early works were introduced to the world under the name "Naesoong Story." The audience response at Ain Gallery and Seoul's Woorim Gallery — my debut show — exceeded expectations. Works like "Naesoong: Acha," "Naesoong: Genitis," "Naesoong: You Who Move Me," "Naesoong: Too Much of a Good Thing," and "Naesoong: Trembling," which have already been introduced through various media, are representative works from this period.
The second half of 2012 was an intense time that grew me into the Kim Hyun Jung I am today. That's because that period allowed an ordinary "art student" to blossom into someone bearing the name "Naesoong artist." If I went back to that time, could I once again fully immerse myself in my work and face those intense days? Things are much better now than they were in 2012. But driven by the momentum built at that time, I'm still working with the same earnest heart. A time of throwing myself into one's work, giving everything, fueled by burning passion and earnestness. Looking back, I think the most defining moment in life might just be every single day.
"Naesoong: Acha (我差) / Oops"
Ink and light color on hanji, collage
2013, Kim Hyun Jung